Social networking surprise

January 30, 2009

This is my second post of the day, which is unusual for me, but something happened today that I needed to write out, and this is the place where I do that.

It’s no secret that I’ve been struggling with balancing work with the rest of my life.  I’m better than I used to be – I don’t cry in my office as often, aren’t as likely to lose it in public or among colleagues – but the grief still oozes out at times, sometimes in small ways, and sometimes more dramatic ways or in ways that have me hiding in the bathroom practicing yoga breathing.

Like many of my coworkers, quite a bit of my family, and several friends, I’m on Facebook.  Today, for a variety of reasons I won’t go into, I posted the following status:


Five minutes later, one of my favorite coworkers ran into my office, nearly in tears, and gave me a hug.  She told me she had dealt with infertility for 8 years, and while she knew it wasn’t the same, she knew, a little bit, about this kind of hurt.  And she said she wanted to give me a hug every time she saw me.

So often social networking seems to connect people in entirely shallow ways.  I knew you for two minutes in college and now you’re a “friend.”  We are fans of caffeine.  We are glad it’s Friday.  These connections are fun, and, for the most part, light and frothy.  Today, however, my social networking play led to a real connection.  It helps to know that this person I only know from work wants to hug me and hates that I’m hurting, and I’m touched that she shared her story with me.

I need to be careful, obviously, about what I post in public forums (this blog is public, but no one at work knows about it so far as I can tell, and I’m not publicizing it’s existence), but I’m so grateful for that hug, for my friend’s warm and open heart.

One comment

  1. Found you by way of Glow. I’m so sorry that sweet Teddy is not in your arms where he belongs. I have somewhat of a love-hate relationship with FB myself…grief is a strange time to be connecting with casual acquaintances. But I’ve also been surprised to make some amazing connections with people in my world…particularly those who know all too much about loss. I’m glad you got that hug.

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