July 1, 2009

While trying to read a newspaper in the waiting room this morning, my hands started shaking, so I folded the paper up, laid it on my lap, and read it that way.  I don’t think N noticed.

The ultrasound tech let us know right away that there was a heartbeat, and for this I am extremely grateful.  One of the nice things about the family practice we use is that people know us, so I didn’t have to explain our history, or worry that she would think I was reacting inappropriately to what is for many women, a happy and fun experience.  This tech is is the same one who first suspected that something was wrong with Teddy, though it took the specialist over a month (and three more ultrasounds) to confirm that there was truly a problem.  She’s very good, and knows us, and was glad to see us again.

After measurements were taken, we were able to listen to the heartbeat and it was the most beautiful 140 beats per minute (“Perfect,” she said) I’ve ever heard. I didn’t cry when I heard it, but I did become light-headed (I was glad to be lying down) and speechless with relief.

We’re measuring three days behind, which puts our treasured little blob at 6 weeks 6 days instead of 7 weeks and 2 days, but this isn’t a big worry.

Still very early, and still so much that could happen, but for right now I’m pregnant.  I’m going to work on trying to enjoy it, on trying to be grateful, and on seeing if I can trust the big, scary Universe, just a little.

And thank you, so much, for being there yesterday.



  1. So glad everything is good so far.

  2. So glad that everything is on track!

  3. I’m so glad that you saw the ultrasound tech who knew your family.
    I’m so, so glad that you heard your little blob’s heartbeat.
    Beat on, little heart. xx

  4. YAY!!!!!

  5. Breathing out Erica. Hang on little one!

  6. Oh my goodness! Thank you for sharing. What incredible news – though I know incredibly scary. I am thinking of you, N, Teddy and your new little one.

  7. I am so glad for you. xo

  8. Yay… 🙂

  9. So glad to hear of that little heartbeat. I’ve been away from the blogs this week but thrilled at your good news!

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